Sunday, October 28, 2007

Because Right Now...I Don't Dare to Breathe

I love to travel. I do. I really do. I didn’t realize how much of an important part of my life it could be until college (this is mostly do to the fact that I rarely ever traveled until college). I even like traveling to many places that most Americans would find completely boring. Nashville was incredibly fun! So was Kansas City next last year! Next year Baltimore will be even better of course. I’m just extremely amazed at how much I enjoy traveling. I guess it is due to my desire to feel like I’ve escaped some burdensome responsibilities, awkward past friendships, and my never-ending workload. In high school I would dream of running away to the circus with a friend of mine to escape the dreariness of high school. Although I’ve never actually been to the circus, I feel like I have succeeded in leaving. The freedom I have now is just completely exhilarating! I can jump on a plane anytime I want paid for the money that I’ve earned! I love the feeling of adventure that I get from traveling and running through the streets of a foreign city with no worries or concerns! So completely amazing!

Speaking of traveling, at the SWE conference, I attended a workshop on “International Relocation”. As a college student, I expected the workshop to address such problems such as graduating on time or the cultural problems that I would face while abroad. I was quite surprised with what was actually covered. A lot of the time I believe that it’s a terrible thing that I think the worlds revolves around me. I need to realize that there is more to the world than life as a college student; it’s quite easy to think this way since we live in such a tightly sealed bubble (an amazing bubble though). I shouldn’t think that the SWE conference is only for college students like me.

The speaker moving her family from country to country, each time learning a new language and adjusting to cultural differences. She spoke about how her young children dealt so much better than the adults. That was interesting for me. I remember moving elementary schools when I was younger. I was quite disappointed for a long long time. I eventually got over it though. I wonder if my parents were ever concerned. But the move was only to an elementary school a few blocks away. The speaker relocated numerous times! Her kids can speak many different languages (so much better than she and her husband can). I guess my point is that I never really thought about how children could complicate decision-making for traveling. (I’m sure kids will complicate decision-making in a whole list of other things that haven’t thought of either heh).

I remember when Clare told me about a religious friend of hers that brought her children with her in her missionary work. I’ve always been a member of the school of thought that encouraged raising children in one place. This is because I was biased due to the fact that I’ve stayed in the same neighborhood my entire life. Whenever I go home, I have this incredible security in my home time. I sleep in the same room. I know where all the utensils are in the kitchen. I know where to find all the good pho places (eat your heart out Vincent). Things never really seem to change at home. This amazing sense of security of always knowing that I have a home in a town I know so well. But is this really necessary? I’m beginning to wonder if it is really necessary. Is home a house, a school, or a neighborhood? Is home your parents? I don’t really know the answer to this. Honestly for the speaker, traveling from country to country definitely worked out for her family. Will it work for mine? I don’t know. I hope that I would be able to be as successful in my career and with my family if I choose to live such a life. It’s just too early to tell. I am hopeful and optimistic.

Of course this means eventually finding a mate that will be willing to leave all his family and good friends to move from country to country every couple of years. Add this requirement to tolerance (excitement might be asking for too much) for adoption, a condescending sense of humor, and a sexy, fit body, and we have a recipe for Tina’s lonely life as a picky picky spinster. And now I wonder when I’ll just give in and settle with a “nice” guy and live a boring, boring, boring, please-take-a-shot-gun-and-shoot-me-in-the-head-to-end-it-all kinda life (maybe when I reach my mid-30s or mid-40s).

Oh well…if I don’t get to live a life like hers…I should at least join the peace corp right? Maybe by then I will become jaded and want to stay in one place for the rest of my life. After that then we have one problem solved.

PS. I just heard of another person in our class who got married. This is starting to freak me out!


Clare said...

Hahahaha. Just ditch the sexy fit body. Mmm... that sounds delectably incriminating.

Glad you enjoyed Nashville.

Helen said...

i'll marry you and we can live in different countries together. i don't think i fit many of your other criteria though